I am a firm believer in zodiac astrology. Being a Gemini, I know that I can get addicted to chaos. Geminis tend to be very adaptable, dramatic, and flexible individuals. We thrive on change, inconsistency, and problem solving. I think more often than not, because we are dual sided, we try to wear too many hats. As I have been working through a lot of triggers and personal issues, I’ve started to realize that myself and many others are addicted to chaos. What exactly do I mean by this? Well, I think we have gotten so used to rocky waters that we are uncomfortable with smooth sailing ships. We have been handed many lemons, made every type of lemonade, and yet we’re still able to figure out how to have left overs to make something else. We developed a knack for picking up the pieces, being the “go to” person, and coming back stronger. With all these wonderful warrior skills, I have noticed that I am always ready to fight. I am in defense mode and ready for war at a moment’s notice. I am working for peace yet positioned to defend and conquer. This is where I noticed the chaos. I do not know how to accept the calm. I see it as “the calm before the storm” and a moment that is given to me to prepare myself.

For instance, I have a friend who dates often. No, seriously, a friend. This isn’t an “asking for a friend…” scenario. She has been single for a while. She finds her self clingy for long periods of time to men that do not make sense. These men are not ready to commit, emotionally unavailable, and just all-around douche bags. As Melissa Leger would state it, “Gumball Guys”*. Yet, often, when she meets someone “great”, she has so many complaints about them. These same complaints are the things she wanted OUT of the "gumball" guys. She wanted them to text more, now this one texts too much. She wanted to be taken on nice dates and have consistent plans, now this guy asks her out too often while she’s busy. It’s that addiction to chaos, the addiction to unhealthy love and the addiction to want to bear through a storm.

How do we stop ourselves from being addicted? Like any addiction, we have to break the habit. Stop indulging. Even if this means that you’re going to be alone for a while, or that you don’t wake up to a few “good morning” texts as you usually would. Start investing time in learning about yourself. Spend a lot more time alone and uncomfortable. When we’re uncomfortable, we grow the most. For those who flourish through change, chaos, and hardship, we are usually the ones that are too afraid of our own thoughts. I don’t mean to be repetitive but a lot of these dating and social issues have such similar conclusions. *I absolutely love Melissa Leger. She is on all social media platforms and has a great concept called Gum Ball Love. Her website is www.gumballlove.com